Friday, March 30, 2012

A Bumpy (Lumpy) Ride!

What is this ugly lump on my hand? The first time I found one of these new strange lumps it was on my palm so I thought it might be a ganglion cyst. It wasn't painful except when I bumped or pressed it. I asked the doctor about it but she really didn't have any comment to offer me at that time. She just looked at it and gave a slight nod then wrote something on her ever-present computer. A friend of mine who is a nurse said in the olden days the treatment for ganglion cysts was to smash it with a heavy book. OUCH!

Shortly thereafter a lump appeared near my right elbow and at the same time my left elbow started to grow a twin. Good grief! This meant I could no longer comfortably lean on my elbows. Time for researching on the intenet. I discovered these lumps were a side effect of RA that many of us deal with. Since that time I have developed a few more nodules, especially in the joints on my hands. I no longer feel a sense of panic. Sure I don't like them but what can I do?

Sometimes I say to my husband "Why...?" followed by whatever is concerning me at the time (why this lump?; why am I so tired?, etc.). He answers patiently, "Honey, you have RA and this just comes with the territory." So I guess we are blazing new territories in our lives and will just have to figure it all out as we go along! It is called LIFE. Time to remind myself that "THIS is the day that the Lord has made, let us rejoice and be glad in it!"

Thursday, March 15, 2012

My Profit and Loss Margin

Is my glass half full or half empty? I was thinking about some of my losses and gains through the experience of dealing with RA and I wanted to share my reflections on the subject:

Here's what's lost:


long walks
the ability to get up easily from a chair
getting down on the floor to play with grandkids
some of the grandkid games that grammas play with them
energy and stamina to cook a big family meal
energy and stamina in general

Here's what I still have:

I can still walk - just not as far
I can still sit in a regular chair
I have grandkids and they love me (the feeling is moo-choo-wul)
There are plenty of games and activities I can still do with them
They take naps so I can take one at the same time
I am blessed with a dear husband, my family and dear friends
I can still cook and there is always "take out"

Here's what I've gained:

Realizing how many people love and support me
Increased creativity
Drawing closer to our dear and loving Lord
More compassion for those who are down and suffering
Deeper understanding of the Scriptures
Better realization of what really matters
More appreciation for each new day
More thankfulness for the day that has passed
    (as I retire for the night in my comfy bed)
Realizing that a merry heart really is like medicine (Prov 17:22)
Deeper love for my family and friends
More grace for how others, and myself, journey through life
     (and to have patience with the process)
Learning to trust the Lord more

So looking at these lists and seeing how much longer the last two are brings a tear to my eye and gratefulness to my heart. If these lists were placed on an old fashioned scale it would tip in the favor of GAIN!! I may have lost certain things but am so grateful for the lessons I am learning. Thank you Jesus that You are always with me and You have promised to "Never leave me or forsake me".

Please share a comment on your profit and loss margin - I would love to hear your thoughts. HUGS!

Bless the Lord oh my soul! Let all that is within me bless HIS holy name! Psalm 103

Friday, March 9, 2012

Decorating the Moon

When you get a flare-up of an auto-immune disease one of the first things the doctor prescribes is more prednisone until things get back under control. Those of you who have had this miracle drug know that with it comes a few negative side affects. One of them might be that you find your face has lost its natural contours and is now round until you taper back off the prednisone. This side affect is called "moon-face". All of a sudden, almost overnight, you look like you've put on several pounds and your face is all puffed up. Gosh, I wish the doctor would prescribe me my own make up artist!

But seeing how that is NOT the case and life must go on, I need to get ready to face the day. I've worn make up for years and for those of us who use these wonderful products it means on occasion we have to "decorate the moon". First, I study my face in the magnifying mirror - an added horror as I observe the swollen cheeks and sunken eyes, but a magnifying mirror is necessary at my age due to reduced vision! Oh well, on to the make up...after I put on foundation its time for some special affects. Where are those cheekbones for the cosmetic blush? Let's see, they should be about right here an inch or two under the eyes; which are sunken in a bit by the swollen flesh of my moon-face, but I forge on! After some deliberation I carefully place the blush to define some cheeks and create definition. (By tilting my head up and slightly to the side I can imagine I've succeeded in achieving the desired affect). Now it is time for eye make-up. Oh oh, with those sunken in eyes and dark circles it means I need to resort to a little concealer magic. Finally, a bit of lip color, add earrings and voila! I'm ready to face the day.

Recently I bought myself a great pair of sunglasses. Isn't it great that large sunglasses are back in style? Now if I could just see where I was going with them on indoors that would be terrific!

Maybe what I need to work on isn't my make up but instead is...I Peter 3:4 "Do not let your adornment be merely outward—arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel, rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God."